Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ) about Workplace Mediation

It is not necessary to bring any things to the mediation. It is desirable to bring an open mind, a willingness to listen, creativity to brainstorm solutions, and a positive attitude.

My role in the mediation is to facilitate the conversation between those in conflict. The parties to the mediation decide what they want to talk about and how they want to resolve the problem. The process empowers each party to state his or her views while the other party or parties listen. With my help, the parties discuss various resolutions to the specific issues. They may craft a mutually satisfactory written agreement. As a mediator, I do not make any decisions, issue any directives, or make any judgments about right or wrong. With my assistance, those in conflict discuss the issues that brought them into conflict and then come to a mutually agreeable resolution.

Studies have shown that when parties in conflict choose a resolution for themselves, they are far more likely to adhere to it than if someone outside of the relationship were to decide for them.

Ideally, everyone who is involved in the conflict should be present. That way, any resolution can be agreed upon by all who are affected by it. The parties should agree in advance as to who should participate in the actual mediation, and whether a friend or other non-participating support person may be present. Lawyers generally are not present in the kind of mediation that I do. If a party desires legal counsel, then the parties need to agree to it in advance of the mediation.

The mediation session is legally confidential. This means that anything said or agreed upon in mediation is not admissible in a court of law. A mediator may not be subpoenaed to appear in a litigation-related proceeding. The parties to a mediation may not be questioned about what was discussed during the course of the mediation. The purpose of confidentiality is to encourage the parties to feel free to discuss personal matters in an open way without fear that the information will turn up in a public venue. In other words, confidentiality helps to establish trust. The parties and their mediator will sign an agreement before the mediation begins wherein they agree to keep the substance of the mediation confidential. You can find a sample agreement here.

The parties to a mediation need to come to the process voluntarily in order for it to be effective. A person who feels pressured to attend and participate is less likely to be committed to an open mind and heart in thinking about, discussing, and resolving conflict.

The mediation process often culminates in a written or oral agreement wherein the parties to the conflict set forth the things they will do to end the conflict and try to prevent future conflict. The ultimate goal of the kind of mediation that I do is to use techniques learned and practiced in the mediation to communicate more effectively in the future so as to address conflict without the need of a mediator.

A mediation agreement is not legally binding. If the parties who enter into such an agreement would like for it to be legally binding, then they may have an attorney draw up an agreement and petition a court to enforce it.

In order to truly communicate, build trust, resolve conflict, and better understand one another, we must communicate effectively. This requires learning the tools to effectively communicate: how to speak, choosing the right words, tone and body language, so that others can best hear what we have to say; how to actively listen in order to demonstrate that we are paying attention respectfully.

When I coach/teach in mediation, in one-on-one sessions, and to groups, I provide the tools to best achieve effective communication, and encourage those with whom I am working to practice using these tools every time and in every place in which communication occurs.