Empathizing is being able to put yourself in the shoes of someone else and imagine what an experience might be like for that person. In so doing, a meeting of the minds can take place and conflict can turn into resolution.
For example, in mediation, one of the parties, an employee, might describe what it was like for him when he received what he felt was an unwarranted write-up from his supervisor. I will encourage his supervisor to put herself in the shoes of that employee, so that she can become more conscious, more sensitive, about her actions. Stepping into someone else’s shoes allows a person to consider that other person’s viewpoint and this, in turn, can lead to greater understanding.
In another example, two co-workers come to mediation after an altercation in the workplace. I learn that the altercation occurred after a series of frustrating events that each had experienced with the other. I work with them to uncover the reasons for the frustrations and their perceptions about each other as a result. Over the course of our sessions, when asked to put themselves in the other’s shoes, they come to understand what each other experienced. Through empathy, they were able to resolve their conflict and make a plan for future communication and interaction should conflict arise again.
By motivating the parties to visualize what it is like for the other, I facilitate their ability to gain insight into each other’s situations, reach understanding and resolve conflict.